☕️ Coffee Catchup: Returning to Hawai'i + Everything I'm Loving in March
+ books, TV shows, movies, Substacks, and more
Got your coffee? Good. Pull up a chair, fabulous. I’m writing this from O’ahu and I have lots of feelings.
I need to tell you about the H3.
For those who don’t know, the H3 is a highway on O’ahu that cuts through the Ko’olau Mountains in a way that should be illegal. You’re in a tunnel, and then suddenly you’re not, and the gorgeous green mountains are on every side of you and Kāne’ohe Bay is spread out below like someone knocked over the most perfect jar of turquoise paint and just... left it there. Gorgeous and unapologetic.
Not gonna lie, the first time you see it can leave you a little bit breathless, like you may or may not want to laugh and cry at the same time.
We’ve been gone since 2019 and only visited once in 2023, the year my brother died. So the moment we came over that bridge and I got my first real look at the valley, something in my body that I didn’t know was tight just... let go. And I got that same breathless feeling and perhaps also got a little choked up.
Because…it felt like HOME.
The amazing thing about living somewhere for 10 years is that it becomes a part of you. The lush green mountains. The smell of the salty sea air — that specific, indescribable O'ahu scent that no candle has ever successfully replicated, I don't care what the label says. The very specific comfort of knowing exactly where you are — where every road goes, which spots are worth stopping for, which beaches are yours.
Max grew up here. This is where his best friend Kyan is from, where our military and soccer people are, where the version of our little family of three that ran on sunshine and shave ice and soccer fields and weekend beach days was born.
We didn’t just live here. We became here.
So when we left in 2019, we didn’t just pack boxes and move. We left an entire life behind…and apparently it just sat here waiting. The people, the places, the feeling of it. Still here. Still ours.
What does that mean then??
I think it means…I have TWO homes.
Florida is home in the bones. Where my mom is, where my siblings are, where the pool and the palm trees and the life I spent two decades promising myself finally exists. That’s the home I earned — the one that holds my history and my people and the version of me that finally stopped moving.
And then there’s Hawaiʻi. The place that shaped us as a family of three. The place where Max became Max. The place that still reaches out through the mountains and the bay and says you are ours and we haven’t forgotten.
The home of my heart.
I want to say something to you about this because I think it matters: so many of us spend midlife grieving the places and versions of ourselves we left behind — the life before the move, before the kids grew up, before everything changed. We treat those chapters like losses. Like something we have to get over.
But what if we don’t? What if some of those lives just... wait for us? What if the places that shaped us aren’t gone — they’re just holding our spot?
Most people spend their whole lives looking for one place that feels like that. Somehow, wildly, I got two.
And our Hawaiʻi people — our community — haven’t forgotten us. Six years gone and they've been filling our calendar all week — showing up, reaching out, cheering for Max's dream before he even had the words for it himself. People who knew us then and still want to know us now.
That kind of love, it turns out, does not have an expiration date.
I didn’t know that for sure until I was on H3, the mountains being dramatic on every side of me, Kāne'ohe Bay glittering below like it had been waiting specifically for us to come back and appreciate it properly, trying to catch my breath and soak it all in.
I am home.
Both of us. All three of us. Still.
I may earn commissions from sales via the Bookshop.org links below, at no extra cost to you. I only share things I’d genuinely press into your hands, and I’m grateful for every click. 💖
Hula by Jasmin Iolani Hakes — Reading this in Hawaiʻi feels almost cliché but do I care? Not even a little. It’s a story about three generations of Hawaiian women in Hilo, their family legacy with hula, and how they fight to protect their culture and their land. It honestly brought me back to Hawai’i before I even got on the plane. A great recommendation by Jeannine Ouellette.
The Correspondent by Virginia Evans — I’d been hearing about this book for weeks when I saw it again on Brittany Viklund’s list. Since I trust her impeccable biblio tastes, I put it on my TBR immediately. Well, guess what? The universe loves me because yesterday I found it on sale for $12.95 at the local bookstore here and snatched it right up. It’s a story told entirely through letters and emails, which sounds perfect to get lost in.
Landman (Paramount+), His & Hers (Netflix), Pluribus (Apple TV+) — All incredible, all completely different, all a hard 10/10. If you can only pick one, start with Landman — Angela and Ainsley are the best mother-daughter duo on television right now and I will die on this hill.
People You Meet on Vacation (Netflix) — So sweet, so good, exactly what it needed to be. Alex’s dance scene was swoon-worthy and Poppy was so relatable I had to pause and collect myself. Loooooved it.
Saltburn (Amazon) — We watched it based on Ibtissam C.| In Transit’s recommendation, who’s travel Susbtack is awesome, btw. We are somewhat traumatized. We have not fully recovered. I will say no more.
Project Hail Mary (Theaters) — We’d only heard good things so we watched it last night in 4D (super fun!) and it was AH-MA-ZING! Ryan Gosling is incredible in every single role he touches and this was no different. My favorite scene was the "acceptance" scene and I shall say absolutely nothing else about it except that you need to see it immediately and bring tissues just in case.
The new Bruno Mars album “The Romantic” has some Latin roots woven through it and my Puerto Rican soul is THRIVING. Also, did you know he has Puerto Rican heritage and was raised in Hawaiʻi? Which means this album is basically custom made for this exact trip.
Also completely obsessed with Justin Bieber and Rosé’s collaborations — “With You“ and “Love You Too“ are on permanent rotation. I’m almost embarrassed about how many times I’ve played them this week. Almost.
And if you want some actual island flavor, find the band Wavvy and start with “Thyme.” Don’t blame me if you start looking at plane tickets to Hawai’i.
Two recipes I bookmarked this week that I fully intend to make the moment I'm back in my Florida kitchen — which, for the record, has actual pots, counter space, and zero excuse not to cook a real meal. No promises on the timeline. Strong promises on the intention.
✍🏽 Bianca Bosso of Midnight Spaghetti made herb-laminated pappardelle stuffed with ricotta and lemon — pasta so beautiful it looks like it should be framed, not eaten. She sketched it first. She sketched it first. I respect it enormously and also feel deeply shown up. Full recipe here.
✍🏽 Rebecca Blackwell of Let’s Get Lost made a one-pot chicken pasta with tomato cream sauce that is the exact kind of cozy, adaptable, nothing-fancy-required weeknight dinner I live for. Chicken, pasta, velvety tomato cream sauce, all in one pan. Rebecca is also a nomad living on an RV, motorcycle, AND sailboat — she is clearly living her best life and writing about it deliciously. Full recipe here.
⤞ Substack Faves:
✍🏽 Gabrielle Blair of Same Boat — Gabrielle founded Alt Summit, wrote a NYT bestseller, raised six kids, and somehow also has time to run one of the most genuinely useful Substacks for women who work on the internet. I can barely remember to take my vitamins. If you're building something online and want to feel less alone doing it, this is your people.
✍🏽 Sarah Bush of The Pink Teacup — Sarah is a mixed media artist in Taos, New Mexico who uses her art to do something I deeply respect: resist authoritarianism with creativity and a sense of humor. Case in point — she's currently making "resistance cootie catchers." One is called "Stop the Broligarchy." I mean. She had me at hello. I don't know what I expected from a newsletter called The Pink Teacup but it was not this and I am so glad it wasn't.
✍🏽 Hana Lee Goldin of Card Catalog — Hana has a master's in Library and Information Science and she's using it to teach the rest of us how to think more clearly in the age of AI without making us feel like we accidentally wandered into a PhD seminar. I leave every issue feeling smarter. My family has not noticed. But I have.
⤞ Substack to Watch:
👀 The Homemade Hostess by Chloe Diaz. Chloe makes homemade desserts that look like they belong in a magazine and somehow also finds time to curate beautiful moments from her life for her Notes. She's seven months in. I'm already a little obsessed. Find her before everyone else does so you can say you knew her when.
💛 Airline pilots. Every single one of them. But especially the ones who land the plane so smoothly you forget you were ever terrified, and also my husband who is currently learning to be one — which means one day I may have a personal pilot, which means I can continue to not have a job. This is called manifesting and I refuse to hear otherwise.
💛 Dresses that require zero coordination, cut you nowhere, and make you look like you tried when you absolutely did not. Midlife has stolen many things from me. My patience for complicated outfits is one of them. These dresses are giving it back.
💛 The Hawaiʻi breeze. Yes, it has destroyed my hair. Yes, it is worth it. My internal temperature has been set to “surface of the sun” for approximately three years now and this breeze is the only thing standing between me and complete chaos.
Had my first ever girls-only breakfast with Keira — the most badass young lady I know — at Cafe Kopi in Kailua. The Mac Mocha was so good it should come with a warning label. Hoping this becomes a tradition. Love her to the moon!
This month we have TWO winners because I missed February — congratulations to Louisa Waikiki and Kate Reimann! Your coffee cards are on their way.
Your coffee could be next. Upgrade to Popstar and get in on the monthly raffle — plus a whole lot more. ☕️
If you made it this far, consider yourself hugged and caffeinated from beautiful Hawai’i. Before you go, if you have a place that drops your heart rate the second you arrive, I want to hear about it. Drop it in the comments. Tell me where your heart home is.
In the meantime, I’ll be over here on a beach somewhere, pretending I don’t have to get on a plane in a few days. See you next time, slightly sun-kissed and very full of shave ice. 💖
💬 LET'S DISCUSS: Which place drops your heart rate the second you arrive?
That trip was exactly what we all needed... can't wait for the next time we get to visit our 2nd home again.